Place your jokes in this section. A little naughty will be tolerated but please no really vulgar ones!!! If you might be offended it may be better to bypass this section!!!
Ducks in Heaven
by pet-els » Mon Jun 29, 2020 4:00 pm
DUCKS IN HEAVEN !!!
Three women die together in an accident and go to heaven.
When they get there, St. Peter says,
'We only have one rule here...
0 Replies
362 Views
Last post by pet-els Mon Jun 29, 2020 4:00 pm
Yul Brynner
by Greynomad » Sun Jun 28, 2020 1:37 pm
First post
Did you know that Yul Brynner was a lifelong supporter of Liverpool FC?
Did you also know that he never wore aftershave?
That’s right: Yul never...
Last post
very good Ray.see they had a good win.
1 Replies
263 Views
Last post by norman Sun Jun 28, 2020 2:36 pm
Slow driver
by Greynomad » Wed Jun 24, 2020 6:44 pm
First post
Bloke walks into the pub & says to the assembled drinkers, “Geez, sorry I’m late fellers. Got stuck behind Arthur. He’s gotta be the slowest driver...
Last post
... but sheep are such social animals. :? 8-)
Sorta like the human variety of Sheeple
Ron
:D :lol: :twisted:
Stop on... ;)
vik... say...
7 Replies
621 Views
Last post by Vik351 Fri Jun 26, 2020 4:08 pm
Trump's Parade
by pet-els » Tue Jun 16, 2020 10:28 am
First post
An assistant to Donald Trump told him she
had a fantastic dream last night. There was
a huge parade down Pennsylvania
Avenue celebrating Trump....
Last post
wasnt good the first time... :( :( :(
vik... :|
X2
Ron
3 Replies
355 Views
Last post by Noggins Sun Jun 21, 2020 6:25 pm
Self-help in a pandemic
by Greynomad » Fri Jun 19, 2020 9:33 pm
First post
During the Great Depression men picked fruit to sell on the streets to survive.
Lady of our acquaintance has updated that idea, given the plethora...
Last post
David,
THIS is having too much time on your hands.... and a very patient dog. 😁
0AF3A41A-E620-4893-9CD4-1ED6F5611FAA.jpeg
5 Replies
720 Views
Last post by Greynomad Sat Jun 20, 2020 12:53 pm
Trump's Parade
by pet-els » Tue Jun 16, 2020 10:25 am
An assistant to Donald Trump told him she
had a fantastic dream last night. There was
a huge parade down Pennsylvania
Avenue celebrating Trump....
0 Replies
221 Views
Last post by pet-els Tue Jun 16, 2020 10:25 am
Lessons in marketing.
by pet-els » Tue Jun 09, 2020 2:51 pm
First post
A PROFESSOR EXPLAINED MARKETING TO MBA STUDENTS
1. You see a gorgeous girl at a party, you go to her and say: I am very rich, marry me . That's...
Last post
Mostly Phillipinos T1. We built a horticultural structure for a plastic surgeon years ago, he turned one Phillipino guy into a girl a day, at 20K a...
4 Replies
341 Views
Last post by Busman Wed Jun 10, 2020 5:07 pm
Gardening with Grandma
by pet-els » Sat May 30, 2020 9:05 am
First post
Gardening with Grandma
A teenage granddaughter comes downstairs for her date with a see-through
blouse on and no bra.
Her grandmother has a fit,...
Last post
:? 8-) ;) :P :lol: :lol: :lol: :roll: :shock: :o
2 Replies
332 Views
Last post by Greynomad Tue Jun 09, 2020 9:13 pm
Flute player
by pet-els » Tue Jun 09, 2020 8:30 am
First post
Lyle was hunting geese in the Northern Minnesota woods. He leaned his old 16 gauge in the corner to take a leak
As luck would have it, his...
Last post
So long as he doesn’t block the one in the end....
Eeeeww!!😳
3 Replies
304 Views
Last post by Greynomad Tue Jun 09, 2020 9:12 pm
Poor Donald
by Greynomad » Sun Mar 29, 2020 5:14 pm
First post
The scene: An executive jet full of VIPs — Donald Trump, Boris Johnson, Angela Merkel, the Pope and a ten-year-old schoolboy, the pilot's nephew.
An...
Last post
Trump congratulates the Queen.jpg
4 Replies
474 Views
Last post by T1 Terry Thu Jun 04, 2020 4:19 pm
0 Replies
221 Views
Last post by Greynomad Sat May 30, 2020 1:13 pm
The Mother Tongue
by Greynomad » Sat May 16, 2020 6:53 pm
First post
Snake - Mother Tongue.jpeg
Last post
... and it doesn’t need an apostrophe, Dottie!
😜
5 Replies
438 Views
Last post by Greynomad Sun May 17, 2020 10:43 pm
Bed games
by Dot » Tue May 12, 2020 11:50 pm
First post
An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes gas and says, 'Seven Points.'
His wife rolls over and says, 'What in the...
Last post
Very good. Soul mates.
1 Replies
295 Views
Last post by jon_d Wed May 13, 2020 9:04 am
Squirrels
by pet-els » Mon May 11, 2020 9:17 am
First post
In a small country town, a band of squirrels had become quite a problem.
The Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide what to do about...
Last post
:lol: :lol: :lol: :roll:
1 Replies
282 Views
Last post by native pepper Mon May 11, 2020 9:47 am
An observation
by flexitdriver » Fri May 08, 2020 1:57 pm
First post
I've absorbed so much disinfectants, soap, and antibacterial sanitizing gels recently that
whenever I go pee, it cleans the toilet.!! :lol:
Last post
I've washed my hands so much they are now actually clean, they haven't been this clean since I was a kid before I started messing with anything...
2 Replies
345 Views
Last post by T1 Terry Fri May 08, 2020 4:03 pm
Aliens
by pet-els » Mon Apr 27, 2020 9:16 am
First post
Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near a gas station that was closed for the night. They approached one of the gas pumps and the younger alien...
Last post
MrsTea enjoyed that one but I'm not sure if it was just the joke she was laughing at or my crap alien voice! :lol:
2 Replies
289 Views
Last post by Cuppa Thu Apr 30, 2020 9:44 am
Do you have an EMU ?
by pet-els » Fri Apr 24, 2020 8:21 am
First post
A truckie walks into an outback cafe with a full-grown emu behind him.
The waitress asks them for their orders.
The truckie says, ‘A...
Last post
That another good one Peter.
Dot where did you take that pic?
That pic was at the Kenworth truck museum. Clever isn't it?
3 Replies
403 Views
Last post by Dot Mon Apr 27, 2020 1:27 pm
God bless little old women
by pet-els » Sun Apr 26, 2020 8:52 am
God bless little old women . . . . .
There were protesters on the concourse handing out pamphlets
on the evils of Australia . I politely declined...
0 Replies
222 Views
Last post by pet-els Sun Apr 26, 2020 8:52 am
Assassins - men or women better ?
by Chuck » Wed Apr 22, 2020 8:53 am
First post
The CIA had an opening for an assassin.
After all the background checks, interviews and testing were done, there were three finalists: two men and...
Last post
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
4 Replies
302 Views
Last post by Coolabah1au Wed Apr 22, 2020 2:38 pm
Toilet Paper shortage
by Greynomad » Sun Apr 19, 2020 12:02 am
First post
Q: Do you know why we're short of toilet paper?
A: Because when one person sneezes , a hundred others SH!T themselves!
Last post
:lol: :lol: :lol:
1 Replies
282 Views
Last post by SteveW Sun Apr 19, 2020 7:40 am
Blonde
by norman » Fri Apr 17, 2020 7:45 pm
First post
A flight from Auckland to Sydney, A blonde gets on only paid economy and sits in a first class seat.Hostess goes up and says You only paid for...
Last post
:lol:
1 Replies
265 Views
Last post by SteveW Sat Apr 18, 2020 8:05 am
Ghost ?
by pet-els » Thu Apr 09, 2020 8:27 am
First post
An extremely modest man was in the hospital for a series of tests, the last of which had left his bodily systems extremely upset.
Upon making...
Last post
tanks here----
Love it Peter, keep 'em coming mate. It made my day.
Keith.
2 Replies
298 Views
Last post by Keith Morris Thu Apr 09, 2020 8:54 am
nurse's revenge
by Dot » Wed Apr 01, 2020 2:19 pm
First post
A motorcycle patrolman was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed appendix. The doctors operated and advised him that all was well. However, the...
Last post
OOOOoooooeeerrr!!
It hurts just thinking about it!! 😳🤭
1 Replies
253 Views
Last post by Greynomad Thu Apr 02, 2020 7:01 pm
Corona Virus Rhapsody
by T1 Terry » Tue Mar 31, 2020 2:00 pm
Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody with words updated for the latest plague. Very well worded, I reckon they did a great job of it
T1 Terry
0 Replies
267 Views
Last post by T1 Terry Tue Mar 31, 2020 2:00 pm
Charlie & Covid-19
by Greynomad » Sun Mar 29, 2020 5:32 pm
First post
Charlie & Covid-19.jpg
Last post
Don't blame me!
Sent to me by Son-and-Heir...
3 Replies
276 Views
Last post by Greynomad Sun Mar 29, 2020 8:33 pm
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