New Research Results
Posted: Fri Apr 05, 2024 5:45 pm
Hot News!!
Scientists in Canada have announced the discovery of the HEAVIEST element yet known to science.
At the moment, Canada is the leading producer of the new element. Although Australia is rapidly ramping up production, and expects to surpass the Canadians later this year.
The new element is GOVERNMENTIUM (Gv).
Its structure contains:
1 NEUTRON,
25 ASSISTANT NEUTRONS,
88 DEPUTY NEUTRONS and
198 ASSISTANT DEPUTY NEUTRONS,
giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called MORONS, which are surrounded by vast quantities of LEFTOVER-like particles called PEONS.
Since Governmentium has no ELECTRONS or PROTONS, it is atomically inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.
A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction which normally takes less than a second to be transformed into a process occupying anywhere from four days to four years to complete.
Governmentium has a normal half-life of four years.
It does not decay, losing any NEUTRONS, but instead undergoes periodic reorganization, in which a percentage of the ASSISTANT NEUTRONS and DEPUTY NEUTRONS exchange places. In fact, Governmentium’s atomic mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more MORONS to become NEUTRONS, forming as a byproduct a large mass of ISODOPES.
This characteristic of MORON PROMOTION leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is spontaneously formed whenever MORONS reach a critical concentration.
This hypothetical quantity is referred to as a CRITICAL MORASS.
When catalyzed with MONEY, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element which radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as many PEONS but twice as many MORONS.
All of the MONEY is consumed in the exchange, and no other by-products are evident.
Scientists in Canada have announced the discovery of the HEAVIEST element yet known to science.
At the moment, Canada is the leading producer of the new element. Although Australia is rapidly ramping up production, and expects to surpass the Canadians later this year.
The new element is GOVERNMENTIUM (Gv).
Its structure contains:
1 NEUTRON,
25 ASSISTANT NEUTRONS,
88 DEPUTY NEUTRONS and
198 ASSISTANT DEPUTY NEUTRONS,
giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called MORONS, which are surrounded by vast quantities of LEFTOVER-like particles called PEONS.
Since Governmentium has no ELECTRONS or PROTONS, it is atomically inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.
A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction which normally takes less than a second to be transformed into a process occupying anywhere from four days to four years to complete.
Governmentium has a normal half-life of four years.
It does not decay, losing any NEUTRONS, but instead undergoes periodic reorganization, in which a percentage of the ASSISTANT NEUTRONS and DEPUTY NEUTRONS exchange places. In fact, Governmentium’s atomic mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more MORONS to become NEUTRONS, forming as a byproduct a large mass of ISODOPES.
This characteristic of MORON PROMOTION leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is spontaneously formed whenever MORONS reach a critical concentration.
This hypothetical quantity is referred to as a CRITICAL MORASS.
When catalyzed with MONEY, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element which radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as many PEONS but twice as many MORONS.
All of the MONEY is consumed in the exchange, and no other by-products are evident.
