Place your jokes in this section. A little naughty will be tolerated but please no really vulgar ones!!! If you might be offended it may be better to bypass this section!!!
Very Old Joke
by Greynomad » Wed Sep 30, 2020 10:34 am
An Englishman, Irishman & a Scot walked into a bar.
Barman says, “Is this some sort of joke?”
🙄
And a blonde walked into a bar.
Should have worn...
0 Replies
202 Views
Last post by Greynomad Wed Sep 30, 2020 10:34 am
Problem post
by Greynomad » Mon Sep 21, 2020 12:07 am
First post
Bluddy Moderators... 8-) :lol:
D562D6E0-B80B-4A4A-8FA9-A10188836602.jpeg
Last post
That hole Ray put up is an asian bog.
So I'd need 4WD Low Range? :?
11 Replies
711 Views
Last post by Greynomad Tue Sep 29, 2020 12:15 am
Home Covid Test
by T1 Terry » Thu Sep 24, 2020 2:14 pm
First post
For those who are concerned they might have Covid 19 but can't be a*sed to go and get tested.
Pour a large glass of red wine, do the whole wine...
Last post
My blurred vision usually self corrects after a few cups of tea. Almost always gone by 11am. But mine is also generally self inflicted. :D
7 Replies
444 Views
Last post by supersparky Fri Sep 25, 2020 2:01 pm
Colonoscopy
by pet-els » Tue Sep 22, 2020 8:40 am
First post
Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning humor columnist for the Miami Herald.
Colonoscopy Journal:
I called my friend Andy Sable, a...
Last post
Yeah but when I had mine they shoved it up the wrong orifice and my husb to be (Mohammad)called off the wedding because I was not intact :lol: :lol:...
11 Replies
656 Views
Last post by T1 Terry Fri Sep 25, 2020 11:55 am
0 Replies
255 Views
Last post by Greynomad Sun Sep 20, 2020 3:30 pm
How to reply
by RobertNotBob » Sun Sep 20, 2020 11:56 am
First post
Found this while cruising this morning
A0007232-B943-4E0D-ABFB-2B2C261B1EBC.jpeg
Last post
The kids & I were chatting the other evening.
I said “I don’t want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on a machine and fluids in a bottle. If...
1 Replies
283 Views
Last post by Greynomad Sun Sep 20, 2020 2:30 pm
Cryptic clue
by Greynomad » Fri Sep 18, 2020 8:40 am
First post
Came across this cryptic clue on a crossword recently:
6 Down: Disguise a small horse as cheese. (10)
A: Mascarpone.
Geddit?
Mask-a-pony :lol:...
Last post
Correct, T1.
I was quoting from a somewhat unreliable memory. 🤭
Thanks for the proper wording.
2 Replies
279 Views
Last post by Greynomad Sat Sep 19, 2020 1:08 pm
A day in the life of a BMW driver
by T1 Terry » Fri Sep 18, 2020 1:54 pm
First post
The other day I was cruising along as usual coming onto one of my multilane highways, which was very busy with inferior cars.
First off, I couldn’t...
Last post
:lol: :lol: :roll: I can't take a Prius seriously at any speed.
4 Replies
361 Views
Last post by supersparky Fri Sep 18, 2020 5:34 pm
Classy Insults
by pet-els » Mon Sep 14, 2020 7:47 am
First post
When insults had class .... and not 4 letter words!
These glorious insults are from an era “ before” the English language got boiled down to...
Last post
The old round was Do you know what I like about you? Nothing After that became exhausted from over use I adapted it to know what I like about you?...
5 Replies
601 Views
Last post by T1 Terry Fri Sep 18, 2020 2:37 pm
Between a Rock & a Hard Place
by Greynomad » Tue Sep 15, 2020 3:42 pm
First post
Just rediscovered this clipping, quoting from the Royal Melbourne Yacht Squadron's magazine, Seabreeze :
The incident apparently took place near...
Last post
I thought I was wrong once, but I was mistaken.
:lol: :lol: :lol:
4 Replies
374 Views
Last post by Greynomad Thu Sep 17, 2020 12:17 am
Change of Gender
by pet-els » Sat Sep 12, 2020 4:39 pm
First post
A group of guys and one girl are sitting together at a ball game. During the game the guys notice the girl knows much more about the game then they...
Last post
That's a good one
Helen
Sent from my SM-J250G using Tapatalk
1 Replies
367 Views
Last post by Helen Grose Mon Sep 14, 2020 6:11 am
Jane & Tarzan
by Dot » Tue Sep 08, 2020 1:24 pm
First post
When Jane initially met Tarzan of the Jungle, she was attracted to him and during her questions about his life, she asked him how he had sex:
Tarzan...
Last post
When Tarzan and Jane were doing, for the want of a better word, body identification
Arm,,, Arm.... Leg,,, Leg, etc etc then to sex parts
She...
6 Replies
492 Views
Last post by Noggins Tue Sep 08, 2020 6:38 pm
Birds
by Dot » Sun Sep 06, 2020 8:10 pm
First post
A lady goes to her priest one day and confesses, Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing.
What...
Last post
.... and that's where the saying came from;
on a wing and a prayer
1 Replies
261 Views
Last post by jon_d Sun Sep 06, 2020 8:50 pm
Gotta get me some Tampons!!
by Shirley » Sat Sep 05, 2020 9:04 am
First post
:lol: :lol:
Always remember Prince Charles's comment about Camilla. :o :roll:
Last post
:lol: :lol:
2 Replies
308 Views
Last post by Shirley Sun Sep 06, 2020 12:52 pm
ATM
by pet-els » Sat Sep 05, 2020 8:58 am
First post
The old gentleman handed his bank card to a bank teller and said, “I would like to withdraw £50 .
The teller told him, “For withdrawals less than...
Last post
Yup!
Age & cunning always beats young & smartar$e...
1 Replies
262 Views
Last post by Greynomad Sun Sep 06, 2020 9:36 am
Cowards
by Dot » Thu Sep 03, 2020 11:09 pm
Mick ran up to a nun. Out of breath he asked, 'Please, may I hide
under your skirt? I'll explain later.'
The nun agreed.
A moment later two Military...
0 Replies
252 Views
Last post by Dot Thu Sep 03, 2020 11:09 pm
Fun with Keys
by Greynomad » Mon Aug 24, 2020 4:59 pm
Sent to me recently...
:P
==============================
Several days ago, I left our local Bunnings, heading out to my ute. I reached into my...
0 Replies
362 Views
Last post by Greynomad Mon Aug 24, 2020 4:59 pm
The Jury
by pet-els » Thu Aug 20, 2020 8:14 am
First post
In a criminal justice system based on 12 individuals, here is a jury to be proud of:
A defendant was on trial for murder.
There was strong...
Last post
Smart lawyer.
Even smarter jury. 😜
2 Replies
356 Views
Last post by Greynomad Thu Aug 20, 2020 3:29 pm
KING ARTHUR AND THE OLD UGLY WOMAN
by pet-els » Sun Aug 16, 2020 9:54 am
First post
KING ARTHUR AND THE OLD UGLY WOMAN
Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighbouring kingdom. The monarch could have...
Last post
Pet-els speakum with straight tongue. Ugh.
White-eyes know more than he looks . 😜
Chief smokum peace pipe with him.
Why would his mother dress...
2 Replies
280 Views
Last post by T1 Terry Mon Aug 17, 2020 1:30 pm
Smiths story
by Dot » Tue Aug 11, 2020 1:41 pm
The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family.
On the day the surrogate father was to...
0 Replies
234 Views
Last post by Dot Tue Aug 11, 2020 1:41 pm
Bank robber
by Greynomad » Sun Aug 09, 2020 12:15 pm
First post
Did you hear about the dyslexic bank robber?
Barged into a bank and yelled, “Sticks in the air... this is a hand-up!”
:lol: :lol: :lol:
(Is it...
Last post
The Irish bank robber who was told there was no cash available because it had all been taken to the vault. He demand $10,000 be put into his bank...
5 Replies
482 Views
Last post by Greynomad Mon Aug 10, 2020 4:44 pm
Thought for the day?
by pet-els » Sat Aug 01, 2020 8:29 am
First post
A VERY DISTURBING REVELATION …………………
Thought for the day?
Sexual activity for senior males: (where were you born?)
Statistics just...
Last post
Good one Peter 😁😁
Bernie
tanks here ---Peter,
reminds me of the one where the wife had the nickname harvey Norman --ie: no interest for 5 years.
2 Replies
348 Views
Last post by Keith Morris Sat Aug 08, 2020 4:00 am
Workshop Tools Explained
by Greynomad » Mon Aug 03, 2020 1:31 pm
First post
With much of the country's residents now having more home-time due to Covid-19,
I thought it would be an opportune time for some helpful guidance on...
Last post
Yeah..... SHIFTY!!
Runnin away...quickly!!
Wrong :lol: It was because every time he (my 1st husb) looked at me he said his nuts tightened up....
7 Replies
507 Views
Last post by Vik351 Wed Aug 05, 2020 4:39 pm
Royal Navy
by pet-els » Tue Jul 28, 2020 8:44 am
First post
UPDATE FROM THE ONCE GREAT BRITISH NAVY...
Latest news from the UK Minister of the Navy:
The Royal Navy is proud to announce its new fleet of Type...
Last post
Very funny but thought provoking at the same time. Makes me ponder once again which way the world is turning.
bobk
2 Replies
371 Views
Last post by bobk Fri Jul 31, 2020 12:43 pm
Irishman & Golf
by Dot » Sat Jul 25, 2020 5:02 pm
First post
On a golf tour in Ireland, Tiger Woods drives his Mercedes to a petrol station in a remote part of the Irish countryside.
The pump attendant, who...
Last post
Yep
5 Replies
435 Views
Last post by Busman Mon Jul 27, 2020 10:03 am
Forum permissions
You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot post attachments in this forum