Caravan safety chains.

[T1 Terry]

I had a similar one with a no stripe policeman trying to impress the 3 stripe officer who was "training" him. He started doing the roadworthy check on the vehicle I was driving and when I refused to operate the wipers or windscreen washers he arced up bringing the 3 striper over to see what the problem was. I asked to see either of their mechanical engineers licence and their roadworthy vehicle inspector certificate explain their limited training was restricted to licence plate inspection and recording, rego sticker validity (they were still a part of the whole system back then) engine number verification if they could find it and tyre tread depth, apart from that they had no qualifications to inspect anything more. When the no striper started to tell me he didn't need any further qualification because being a police officer was all the qualification he needed, the 3 striper lead him away rather quickly. I then produced my roadworthy inspectors ticket, my NSW mechanic licence, my membership of the Institute of Mechanical Engineers card and my defect book. I've never heard such sweat talking from a 3 striper before and the no striper was told in no uncertain terms to sit in the car and shut up, he had already caused enough trouble.
Any police action after that was where they either didn't know me or they were 100% in the clear of it turning bad on them.
Pity it didn't transfer to SA

[supersparky]

T1 and Noggins, you blokes are cruel. But I would have loved to be there.
I arced up one night when I was younger and out playing and the nice man broke my tail light with his torch. Then asked me if I wanted to argue the point. I very quickly STFU and me and all my DH mates went home.

[Grandad]

I asked to see either of their mechanical engineers licence and their roadworthy vehicle inspector certificate explain their limited training was restricted to licence plate inspection and recording, rego sticker validity (they were still a part of the whole system back then) engine number verification if they could find it and tyre tread depth, apart from that they had no qualifications to inspect anything more.

I so wish I could pull off what you managed to do.

Many moons ago I was pulled over by the boys in blue and they put a canary on my car. Reason? Worn king pins. I suggested the car actually didn't have any king pins and was told not to give any more lip or I'd end up being taken to the station.
I was 18.

Jim

[T1 Terry]

I received a lot of defect notices and fines before I understood how the system worked. The first thing the policeman would ask is it I thought the exhaust was too loud, the correct answer is no, even if there was no muffler on the vehicle They need to produce a decibel meter and reading complete with photos of how the meter was set up to prove it was a test in accordance with the manufacturers testing parameters to get it through court if you don't agree about the sound level. A bald tyre needs proof the officer actually used the tread depth device and it showed the tyre had less than the legal tread depth and that had to be proved in court with either a second officer backing up on the visual or a photo. No phone cameras back then, so they needed to provide an actual photo and the film negative to prove it hadn't been altered. They probably could have gotten around that bit but most of them were clueless once you got them up in the witness stand to present their prima facie case. This is the part where you put doubt in the magistrate's mind and trip up the police officer because they aren't expecting to be on the defencive this early in the proceedings with no police prosecutor to shield them. If he can't present a clear and unquestionable case at the very beginning, the magistrate must throw it out of court.
The speeding one was the best. If they used the radar they had to produce the visual for you to see and it had to be flashing showing it was a new reading and not saved from a previous recording. Once you had them presenting their case you could ask them just about anything. How did you obtain the reading, hand held of stationary mounted? Who trained you in setting up such a device? What record do you have that this installation was tested according to the manufacturers specifications with at least 2 test runs with a verifiable speed vehicle at different speeds to verify accuracy across the full range .... that one stuffed them most times. If they were mobile and used the Police Special speedo to clock your speed, when they presented the calibration certificate you asked if you could view it, then ask where the body identification number of the vehicle it was calibrated to was on the certificate. This involved the certificated being handed around the court like it was a pass the parcel game. Eventually the magistrate would ask the officer where that number was to verify the whole set up was calibrated, then the police prosecutor would get involved so they would all have to view the report, then it had to be returned to the officer and the magistrate would ask the police prosecutor if he had been able to identify where the vehicle identification number was, then the officer was asked again and about this point the magistrate had run out of patience and dismissed the case. Eventually the police special was no longer accepted as a proof of speed device.
It wasn't until I was in my late teens I started to understand how it all worked and in my twenties until I knew enough to take the system on in a court. Only lost a couple in court after that, one was using a very expensive legal hound and the other because I'd forgotten the court date so it was an appeal and that requires hard evidence of innocence rather than putting a shadow of doubt into the prosecution's case.

T1 Terry