Actual translation Chinese to English

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Hurrow wat yu wunt !!!!!


Subject: Chinese Translated as only they can



Brilliant Beijing Hotel Brochure - Translated as only they can.
A friend went to Beijing recently and was given this brochure by the hotel.
It is precious.
Obviously, it has been translated directly, word for word from Mandarin to English.

> Getting There:

> Our representative will make you wait at the airport. The bus to the
> hotel runs along the lake shore. Soon you will feel pleasure in passing
> water. You will know that you are getting near the hotel, because you will
> go
> round the bend. The manager will await you in the entrance hall. He
> always
> tries to have intercourse with all new guests.
The Hotel:
>
> This is a family hotel, so children are very welcome. We of course are
> always pleased to accept adultery. Highly skilled nurses are available in
> the
> evenings to put down your children. Guests are invited to conjugate in the
> bar and expose themselves to others. But please note that ladies are not
> allowed to have babies in the bar. We organize social games, so no guest
> is
> ever left alone to play with them self.
>
>
>
> The Restaurant:
>
> Our menus have been carefully chosen to be ordinary and unexciting. At
> dinner, our quartet will circulate from table to table, and fiddle with you.
>
>
>
> Your Room:
>
> Every room has excellent facilities for your private parts. In winter,
> every room is on heat. Each room has a balcony offering views of
> outstanding
> obscenity ! .. You will not be disturbed by traffic noise, since the road
> between the hotel and the lake is used only by pederasts.
>
>
>
> Bed:
>
> Your bed has been made in accordance with local tradition. If you have
> any other ideas please ring for the chambermaid. Please take advantage of
> her. She will be very pleased to squash your shirts, blouses and
> underwear.
> If asked, she will also squeeze your trousers.
>
>
>
> Above All:
>
> When you leave us at the end of your holiday, you will have no hope. You
> will struggle to forget it.
>
>
>

[T1 Terry]

Does sound good, which hotel and did they live up to the sell? Or was it like the menu, ordinary and unexciting? The chamber maid squeezing my trousers sounds like something not to be missed along with the view from the balcony, not too sure about the manager putting the hard word on me though