Red Necks

[Dot]

After their 11th child, a Kentucky couple decided that was enough, as they could not afford a larger bed. So, the husband went to his veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin didn't want to have any more children.

The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem but that it was expensive. 'A less costly alternative,' said the doctor, 'is to go home, get a cherry bomb, (fireworks are legal in Kentucky) light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up to your ear and count to 10.

The Kentuckian said to the doctor, 'I may not be the smartest tool in the shed, but I don't see how putting a cherry bomb in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me. ''Trust me,' said the doctor.

So, the man went home, lit a cherry bomb and put it in a beer can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count! "1" "2" "3" “4” "5," at which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs and continued counting on his other hand.

This procedure also works in Tennessee, Louisiana, Arkansas, Mississippi, Parts of Georgia, Missouri, West Virginia, and all of Washington DC.

[Greynomad]

Good one, Dottie!
About as subtle as a house brick to the genitalia.

[Chuck]

Good one, Dottie!
About as subtle as a house brick to the genitalia.

Umm... so it now only works on the Italian generation... huh?

[Greynomad]

Chuck,
“Genitalia” is NOT Italy’s national airline...

[T1 Terry]

Chuck,
“Genitalia” is NOT Italy’s national airline...

Reminds me of the old joke when Ansett went to the wall. There was a rumour Dick Smith and Big Kev were going to form a partnership to take over the airline and name it "Big Dick Airways" They planned to use the long body jets with the new name painted up each side and they aimed to target Virgin customers. In an interview Big Kev used his famous punch line "I'm exited"

[Vik351]

Wish I kept a packet of hus matches when he was makin em...

My kids wont believe me ...

Dick Heads with his gumby face on the pack ...!!!

Vik...

[T1 Terry]

Wish I kept a packet of hus matches when he was makin em...

My kids wont believe me ...

Dick Heads with his gumby face on the pack ...!!!

Vik...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dickheads_(brand)

[Greynomad]

T1,
That link is viable, but within it is a link to Dick Smith Foods. I believe that company has now folded...
From the Wikipedia page:

"On 26 July 2018, Dick Smith announced the business would close in 2019 due to competition with German supermarket Aldi and to avoid bankruptcy.[3]"

After further searching:

https://dicksmithfoods.com.au/dick-smith-foods-close/

[T1 Terry]

Well, that was the official line, but I'm guess the reality was he was making so much with much less effort from his premium meat and grocery supply to the fine dining houses the Dick Smith Foods line was maybe a bit of an embarrassment and just too much work for too little profit.

On the good old Aussie theme, good to see a local Adelaide company has bought back the Violet Crumble bar and now the Polly Waffle from Nestle. Another grat Australian turn around was Darrell Lea, I think the products are still as good as they were in the past but I don't think they are still produced in the Rocky Point Rd factory near Kogarah any more. I seem to remember something about a factory in Ingleburn near Liverpool NSW and another take over type deal with a Melbourne factory. Even the mighty Vegemite is back in Australian hands with Bega Cheese rescuing it back from certain death. So Dick Smith with his Aussie Foods push has shown some positive results, good on 'im

T1 Terry