Place your jokes in this section. A little naughty will be tolerated but please no really vulgar ones!!! If you might be offended it may be better to bypass this section!!!
Keeping a low profile.
by Kit Kat » Tue Apr 23, 2013 11:40 am
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A man and woman were having a quiet, romantic dinner in a fine restaurant. They were gazing lovingly at each other and holding hands.
Their...
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RSPCA Approved :lol:
6 Replies
917 Views
Last post by Dot Thu Feb 14, 2019 12:34 am
Just a good Laugh
by Dot » Sun Jan 20, 2019 6:53 pm
First post
THIS IS AN ACTUAL CUSTOMER REVIEW FROM A MAN ON
AFTER USING VEET HAIR REMOVAL CREAM FOR MEN.
After having been told my danglies looked like an...
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Don’t think I’ll share this one with SWMBO...
She might have more reasons for rejecting the application! 😜🤭😢
5 Replies
996 Views
Last post by Greynomad Tue Feb 12, 2019 1:47 pm
Tight Skirt
by Dot » Sun Feb 03, 2019 5:14 pm
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As the bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the...
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An oldie but a goodie.
2 Replies
681 Views
Last post by Macca Fri Feb 08, 2019 10:16 am
Eighty Mile Mick
by Greynomad » Mon Feb 04, 2019 10:37 pm
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I read recently that in the timber country of North East NSW, there was a bullocky known as ‘Eighty Mile Mick’.
His mates apparently called him...
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Apparently the bush where he hauled logs was so thick a dog couldn’t bark in it. 😳
1 Replies
439 Views
Last post by Greynomad Tue Feb 05, 2019 5:08 pm
A Beautiful Climbing Rose.
by Chuck » Thu Jan 31, 2019 11:09 am
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Oh what a tangled language English is and how easy it is to misconstrue.....!
This just shows we must not believe in Google absolutely!
A man...
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Two girls chatting about the weekend coming up
The brunet says “I hope Chaz doesent buy me 12 red roses again on Friday”
The blondie “Oh how...
3 Replies
382 Views
Last post by Vik351 Thu Jan 31, 2019 11:21 pm
Travel Plans.
by Chuck » Mon Jan 28, 2019 8:38 am
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I have been in many places, but I've never been in Kahoots. Apparently, you can't go alone, you have to be in Kahoots with someone.
I've also never...
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Bet I beat all of you. :lol: :lol:
7 Replies
722 Views
Last post by Dot Wed Jan 30, 2019 5:24 pm
Red Necks
by Dot » Sun Jan 20, 2019 4:12 pm
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After their 11th child, a Kentucky couple decided that was enough, as they could not afford a larger bed. So, the husband went to his veterinarian...
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Well, that was the official line, but I'm guess the reality was he was making so much with much less effort from his premium meat and grocery supply...
8 Replies
1084 Views
Last post by T1 Terry Tue Jan 29, 2019 6:33 pm
SOS
by pet-els » Sat Jan 26, 2019 11:53 am
First post
An Airbus 380 is on its way across the Atlantic. It flies consistently at 800 km/h at 30,000 feet, when suddenly a Eurofighter with Tempo Mach 2...
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Good one Peter, I like that way of thinking! :lol: :lol: :roll:
1 Replies
357 Views
Last post by supersparky Sat Jan 26, 2019 3:48 pm
3 virgin sisters marry
by Dot » Tue Jan 22, 2019 4:20 pm
First post
Three virgin sisters were all getting married within a short time period.
Mum was a bit worried about how their sex life would get started and made...
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No wonder the writing was shaky, the action might have still been happening :lol:
1 Replies
388 Views
Last post by T1 Terry Wed Jan 23, 2019 11:00 am
0 Replies
286 Views
Last post by Greynomad Wed Jan 23, 2019 9:32 am
Johnny again
by Dot » Sat Jan 19, 2019 7:05 pm
First post
Johnny wanted to have sex with a girl in his office,
But she belonged to someone else...
One day, Johnny got so frustrated that he went up to
her...
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Hmmmmm...
Maybe I’ll try that...
SWMBO is always asking me to empty my wallet... 😜
1 Replies
377 Views
Last post by Greynomad Mon Jan 21, 2019 6:58 pm
How do you .......
by T1 Terry » Tue Jan 08, 2019 2:58 pm
First post
A starter that should get a laugh from some, maybe not from others though ;)
How do you milk a sheep?
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How do you win Lotto... :?
Buy a ticket, and hope its the right one! :lol: :lol:
But what if you're left handed ?
Then you,ll never win...
13 Replies
1562 Views
Last post by norman Mon Jan 21, 2019 5:47 pm
Life Explained
by Dot » Sat Jan 19, 2019 6:55 pm
First post
On the first day God created the dog and said:
'Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or
walks past. For this, I...
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Dottie,
You’ve been reading my mail again...
😜
2 Replies
462 Views
Last post by Greynomad Sun Jan 20, 2019 5:02 pm
Drs Visit
by Dot » Sat Jan 19, 2019 6:58 pm
After a visit to a massage parlour, a man discovers a painful lump on his penis, so he goes to see his GP.
'I'm afraid this is serious,' the doctor...
0 Replies
329 Views
Last post by Dot Sat Jan 19, 2019 6:58 pm
One for Chuck
by pet-els » Sun Dec 16, 2018 9:59 am
First post
Better than a Flu
Shot!
Miss Beatrice,
The church organist,
Was in her eighties
And had never been married. She was admired for her
sweetness and...
Last post
Husband to wife
Why don't you let me know when your having an orgasm?
Wife to husband
I don't like to call you at work.
George
Oh yeah :lol:
9 Replies
938 Views
Last post by Dot Thu Jan 17, 2019 6:29 pm
Lady check up
by Dot » Sun Jan 13, 2019 4:41 pm
First post
So, I went in for a routine lady checkup, right... And of course I scrubbed and shaved like I was going on a first date with with the man of my...
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I never thought anything would beat our BAYING TO THE MOON ...
But you you just did Dot.
Onya mate!! xxx
4 Replies
736 Views
Last post by Chuck Wed Jan 16, 2019 10:32 am
Hitch hiker...
by Chuck » Wed Jan 09, 2019 10:42 am
First post
I PICKED UP A HITCH-HIKER. SEEMED LIKE A NICE GUY.
AFTER A FEW KILOMETERS HE ASKED ME IF I WASN'T AFRAID HE MIGHT BE A SERIAL KILLER?
I TOLD HIM...
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Another good one Chuck. :lol: :lol: :lol:
1 Replies
557 Views
Last post by supersparky Wed Jan 09, 2019 2:21 pm
Why I don't Go Fishing
by Greynomad » Sat Jan 05, 2019 5:26 pm
First post
This is why I don't like fishing...
Toon - Fishing.JPG
... and after starting with my cousin on Lake Macquarie (NSW) at age 10, here's my first...
Last post
Sent from my SM-J250G using Tapatalk
3 Replies
497 Views
Last post by Helen Grose Tue Jan 08, 2019 1:01 pm
Mozzies Beware!
by Greynomad » Sat Jan 05, 2019 5:28 pm
Or is that :? Mozzies! Beware...
Toon - Mozzies.JPG
0 Replies
324 Views
Last post by Greynomad Sat Jan 05, 2019 5:28 pm
Tickets.
by Chuck » Thu Jan 03, 2019 10:30 am
Rangers v Celtic.
I don’t know if this interests you or if you can help in any way.
A friend of mine has two tickets in a corporate box for...
0 Replies
287 Views
Last post by Chuck Thu Jan 03, 2019 10:30 am
Names...
by Greynomad » Tue Jan 01, 2019 11:56 am
First post
SWMBO taught some kids with strange names...
Most were of foreign origin, translating their names from their native language into English: Rising...
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T1,
I think you’re right.
I doubt there are many apprenticeship jokes to top that!
Good one!!!
:lol: :lol: :lol:
15 Replies
1138 Views
Last post by Greynomad Thu Jan 03, 2019 8:10 am
Rare tools
by idexnz » Wed Jan 02, 2019 3:00 pm
First post
If ever in Invercargill, NZ you must call into Hayes Hammer Hardware in the central city. Amongst a lot of other very interesting things they have a...
Last post
I have an Irish Chainsaw hanging in our ODLA... :D :lol:
IMG_1230.JPG
3 Replies
514 Views
Last post by Greynomad Wed Jan 02, 2019 3:51 pm
A fart joke
by Dot » Sun Dec 30, 2018 7:46 pm
First post
A lady walks into Harrods. She looks around, spots a beautiful diamond bracelet and walks over to inspect it. As she bends over to look more closely,...
Last post
Fact or fiction...???
Some knob on tv ,a pommy, reckons he was with the queen and the mob on horses for some fancy reason and the queens horse...
2 Replies
450 Views
Last post by Vik351 Mon Dec 31, 2018 12:15 am
Just a laugth
by RobertNotBob » Sun Dec 30, 2018 11:51 am
First post
980F6E20-A3B6-49E7-825A-3BEDFA389EE5.jpeg
Last post
Ha Ha Ha. Good one RnB, I needed something to brighten my day. :lol: :lol: :roll:
1 Replies
321 Views
Last post by supersparky Sun Dec 30, 2018 1:48 pm
The Way Politics Works
by homeless » Sun Dec 16, 2018 12:36 pm
First post
Another one for you lot
I TOLD MY SON, YOU WILL MARRY THE GIRL I CHOOSE.
HE SAID, NO.
I TOLD HIM, SHE IS BILL GATES' DAUGHTER.
HE SAID, YES.
I...
Last post
Uh, T1,
Run that by me again...
I missed the bit about lifting yourself by the bootstraps.
Ummm....... Basically, the whole thing ends up with the...
6 Replies
611 Views
Last post by T1 Terry Sat Dec 29, 2018 4:41 pm
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